WHY DID I WRITE THIS BOOK?

Over the past few weeks, I’ve spent several evenings putting together a video to help promote Marriage is Worth the Fight. What started as a simple marketing effort turned into something much more personal. As I worked on it, I found myself reflecting deeply on the original reason I felt compelled to write this book. It was never just about becoming an author. I have had that desire for years and plenty of ideas for what to write about. But none of those ideas moved me to action like this one did.

Over the years, I’ve had the opportunity to talk with many husbands and observe many more. What stood out most in those conversations was how few men seem to understand the connection between their marriage and their personal calling. For many, it was like hearing something completely new. They had never considered the weight and meaning of the union they had entered into. Most of the time, they viewed marriage through the lens of personal happiness and fulfillment. And that is completely understandable. It is how most of us begin our journey into marriage. But it is not the full picture.

Marriage is more than a source of companionship or joy. It is a path toward legacy, purpose, and eternal impact. Think about it. If you are a son of God through Jesus Christ, and your wife is His daughter, then something profound is happening in your marriage. Out of all the men in the world, God entrusted His daughter to you. That is not just a responsibility. It is a blessing.

I would encourage you to see it like this. Out of every man on earth, God chose to bless you with His daughter.

When a friend watched the video I made, he told me, “It shows a different side of marriage. There is such joy and fulfillment in pursuing your wife.” I thought that summed it up perfectly.

Most of us enter marriage with expectations. The problem is, those expectations are usually centered on what marriage can do for us. And those expectations often collapse under the weight of reality. Not because marriage is broken. Far from it. I and many other husbands can tell you that marriage is one of the greatest blessings life has to offer. But it did not become that by demanding it to be. The truth is, when you make happiness the goal of marriage, it usually fails. Marriage was not designed to meet your deepest needs. Only God Himself can fill those needs. It was designed to shape you and to make you more useful in God’s hands.

This is one of those truths that seems to go against everything the world tells us. When you chase happiness, it remains out of reach. But when you make your marriage about knowing and serving God, joy becomes the byproduct. Even though we can't fully comprehend why, God seems to love working this way.

Marriage was designed to refine you and make you more impactful. That is why He gave you your wife. She brings strengths that you do not have. She supports you, counsels you, challenges you, and encourages you. She brings wisdom, beauty, refreshment, and perspective. She is a gift beyond measure.

That is the heart behind Marriage is Worth the Fight. I want men to see their wives as equals, made in the image of God. I want them to understand that their masculine design is good, and that it was meant to work in harmony with the feminine design of their wife. Together, you create something powerful. Something the enemy fears. Something that is worth protecting.

So do not give up. Marriage is worth the fight. Not only because it brings happiness, but because it is one of the clearest paths to living a life of meaning and purpose in God’s Kingdom. God’s wisdom in designing it is awe-inspiring. I hope you will help me share this message. Help me spread a movement that calls men back to dignity, purpose, and strength through the beautiful gift of marriage.