June 30, 2026
“But this is the new covenant I will make with the people of Israel on that day, says the Lord: I will put my laws in their minds, and I will write them on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people.”
Hebrews 8:10 NLT
I love God’s Word. I have always cherished His written Word and sought to apply it to my life in the best way I know how. Scripture brings clarity and wisdom to every season of our lives because it is alive, speaking to us across the ages. It is not old or irrelevant, but just as applicable today as it has ever been.
The beautiful thing about our God, however, is that He has never stopped speaking His Word in fresh ways that make it relevant to where we are today. He never changes His truth, for it is part of His very nature. But He does put His law in our minds and write His truths upon our hearts so that we can express those eternal truths in new ways.
As I have been writing over the past year, similar themes have continued to bubble to the surface. I never intentionally put them into words until now, but as I look back, I can see them woven throughout much of what I have written about marriage.
They are:
Pursue God. Be Transformed. Build Intimacy.
I believe with all my heart that these three actions can turn any marriage from a disastrous wasteland into a flourishing garden of God’s goodness. So I decided to use them as the organizing framework for everything I create, ensuring that everything I make, now and in the future, points back to and supports these three ideas.
Pursue God
One of the greatest revelations God gave me during a difficult season in my marriage was my complete inability to change or satisfy my wife. In my own strength, I could not influence her heart, manipulate it, or force it into becoming what I wanted. I simply did not possess that kind of power.
Pursue God is the humble recognition that only God can transform hearts. Only He can give us the strength, grace, wisdom, and endurance we need to continue loving well. Without Him, we burn out and give up. But with Him, we can weather any storm and become a beacon of hope to our spouse.
Be Transformed
Since we do not have the power to change anyone else, the only house we are responsible for putting in order is our own.
Be Transformed is the radical decision to die to ourselves, grow deeper in our love for God, and fully commit to His ways. As we do, our focus shifts away from ourselves, creating fertile ground for blessing our spouse. We become less concerned with where our marriage is going and more concerned with who we are becoming.
Build Intimacy
This is where intentional love takes action.
We deliberately take our minds off ourselves, focus on our spouse and the season they are walking through, and take practical steps toward meeting their wants and needs. We invite them into our inner world, sharing our lives with them, body and soul, while building a shared vision for the future.
When two people love one another the way Jesus loves us, they become a powerhouse of purpose and a living testimony of God’s love to the world.
I believe God has impressed this framework upon my heart. It expresses nothing new that Scripture has not already taught, but I believe He desires to use it to strengthen and restore marriages.
The Goal
The goal is oneness through personal transformation.
This unity matters deeply. Jesus Himself prayed for it in the garden just before His arrest. He prayed that His followers would be one. How beautiful it is when that unity begins with husband and wife, in the very institution God designed to take two and make them one.